Botswana on high alert over potential spread of ‘Dead Goat syndrome’

Health officials in Botswana have been put on high alert over the potential spread of Dead Goat syndrome after a known sufferer from Ghana arrived in the southern African country on Monday.

The head of the country’s Disease Control Unit identified the Ghanaian as John, a self-diagnosed sufferer of Dead Goat syndrome who arrived in Botswana on a taxpayer-funded globetrotting adventure. The disease control expert pointed out that John’s short stay in Botswana could pose a potential health treat to the country’s leaders. “There is a real risk that our leaders may be infected through contact with this gentleman from Ghana.”

The Dead Goat syndrome, according to experts, “commonly affects a head that wears the crown” and spreads through interactions with unwholesome agents. Dead Goat syndrome, also known as ‘Yentie Obiaa’ in Ghana, is characterised by a high level of apathy which causes sufferers to disregard the plight of the common man as nothing more than a nuisance.

Concerned health officials in Botswana admitted that their leaders are struggling with their own set of diseases, hence “did not need this Dead Goat syndrome.”

John has since travelled back to his hometown of Flagstaff House, Ghana, where the disease is widespread.

A team of Ghanaian scientists who claim to have a remedy for Dead Goat syndrome say “the simply cure is to give John and his friends a dose of krokromoti power.”

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