Some things are for Johns only- Alan John Kyeremanten

Alan John Kyeremanten, a leading member of the National Patriotic Party and a former minister of state has reportedly launched his flagbearership campaign in New York, with the theme: “For Johns only.”

Dressed in a sleek black tuxedo and a slim pointed batswing bow tie with a white pleated shirt, Mr. Kyeremanten announced himself to party loyalists and potential delegates in a classic James Bond fashion, “My name is John, John Cash!”

John Cash, who has twice lost the party’s flagbearership race to Nana Addo Dankwa Akufo-Addo, is convinced the NPP has been unable win power in the last two presidential elections because of its failure to field a candidate by the name of John.

“John Boom Rawlings, John Sexy- Eye Kufour, John Nana Asomdwe Atta-Mills, John Akomfem Mahama. Apart from the odd middle names, these past presidents and the current one are all named John. I am a John and I have acquired an odd middle name already- Cash. So if the NPP really wants to wrestle power from the ruling NDC, then I am the man for the job.The presidency is for Johns only and that is clear for all to see! Let’s try and understand the psychology of Ghanaians; they only vote for Johns.”

Questioned on how he intends to defeat the ruling NDC, who are likely to field the current president, John Mahama, John Cash answered, “If I get the nod to lead this party, I will simply add another John to my name. I will then be known as John Alan John Kyeremanten and that should do the trick.”

Rounding off the launch, the former ambassador to the United States delivered a simple message to his opponents in the race to lead the party, “some things are for Johns only.”

Sources within the Akufo-Addo camp suggest the elder statesman is beginning to believe the ‘John Myth’ and is seriously considering a name change.

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