The YesiYesi Newspaper Review- Potty Training

POTTY TRAINING 

Potty training – of minds, humour, spirit and bodily emissions – remains a moving target. In Ghana and well beyond, clearly ‘doing a number 2’ is important.

President Paul Kagame, the silent and deeply effective butcher of Rwanda, infact mention his name in certain dissident quarters and the people there will go potty with fear and may well go to the potty in their pants.  

Kagame has skilfully engineered an overwhelming endorsement of a third illegal term for himself and has since criticised his neighbour President Nkurinziza of Burundi for mismanaging the same toilette feat. Across the border, Pierre, a soccer fanatic has engineered a similar illegal return match, except without potty training. Daily violence in Bujumbura and bodies in the street point to his fundamental lack of potty etiquette. Kagame is not impressed. He will also be deeply unhappy with the emissions from Ghana’s opposition NPP and the ruling NDC.

The NPP’s Chairman of Fomena in the Ashanti region has responded to his suspension and referral to the disciplinary committee of the party for allegedly supporting a rowdy picket to protest the suspension of the party chairman by doing a humiliating potty publicly in his short pants. The newspapers report that Kwasi Nti is ‘praying’ for reinstatement. Next time, wipe properly. And wash your hands thoroughly. With soap under running water.

The NDC too has gone full congo on the potty training policy and is proving their point by copying the rival NPP again. 2 members of the party have been sacked/suspended including an aspirant to Parliament for doing an Afoko. In their case, they and their agents threw verbal (as opposed to actual) acid designed to bring the party into disrepute.

The Minister of Education is potty. She has insisted again, publicly that basic education should be provided in local languages. And she has finally done something to prove that her word is her bond. Her Ministry has proceeded to allegedly order an eye watering $40 million worth of dictionaries for said basic schools. In English. Potty.

YesiYesi reporting from a HIPC KVIP.  

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