Thousands of Angolans to head to Ghana if nation decides to host AFCON 2015

Thousands of migrants from Angola are expected to flock to Ghana for work if the government grants CAF’s request to host next year’s African Cup of Nations.

Immigration officials say the Angolans will be employed by government officials and their cronies to provide directions to supermarkets and other very recognisable landmarks. “Who needs Google Maps when you have Angolans. These people are highly skilled in providing directions to supermarkets, popular joints, brothels; you name them and they’ll point you in the right direction for only a small fee.”

Officials revealed the Angolans have already agreed to a standard fee per direction. “It will be the same rates they had in Brazil; $20,000 for each direction.” Officials also confirmed that all contractual agreements between any government official and an Angolan will be strictly verbal and not written.

A government appointee who previously worked with an Angolan in Brazil expressed his delight at the prospect of working with other Angolans should the government decide to host the continent’s biggest football tournament in 2015. “I am looking forward to working once again with these Angolans,” he said. This time they wouldn’t be directing me only to supermarkets, they can direct me to my own house also. Sometimes I do forget where I live you know.”

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