Isle of Flagstaff House demands Scotland-style referendum

Inspired by events in Scotland, the people of the Isle of Flagstaff House have reportedly demanded a Scotland-style referendum to decide if it stays in a union with the rest of Ghana or breaks away as an independent state.

The nationalists argue that if the island is to preserve its cultural heritage then it is essential for them to separate themselves from the rest of Ghana. “The Isle of Flagstaff House has always been, in a lot of ways, another country. A lot of things sets us apart from the rest of Ghana. We uphold the values of greed, dishonesty and general incompetence; same cannot be said for the rest of Ghana. We even have our own language- Gibberish, the only language we speak and understand. These distinct cultural identities can only be best preserved in an independent Isle of Flagstaff House,” argues John Odramani, the charismatic leader of the nationalist movement on the island.

Unlike the Scottish who are still unsure about which currency they will be using if they do split from the United Kingdom, nationalists in the Isle of Flagstaff House already have advanced plans to roll out it’s own currency, the Dra-Money. It will also have it’s own anthem, ‘e Dey Be K3k3,’ to be written and composed by the island’s great looting singing group, Elvis and the Wailers.

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